definitely not my last entry...

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته

3 years has passed since you've (Little Mr. I) joined Taska and next year will be Little Miss S's turn. I can't help but feeling overwhelmed for the past three years. The both of you  has grown so much and has made me loved you deeper each day... mama will always cherish every moments and times spent with all of my children. All the memories wihich I should have entered into this blog but insya-Allah will try to fit in when the time suits.

As of today, Little Mr. I is Young Mr. I *hehe* Me and husband decided to circumcised him at the start of the school holiday this year.  Alhamdulillah, he actually enjoyed going through his 2 weeks recovery *rollseyes* pasal apa tu nah? Pasal kena pamper berabissssss.... makan minum semua kena hidang! I was abit worried, ok... that's an understatement.. I was worried berabissssss that he'll be complaining throughout but syukur, he's so excited to finally have done it (at 6 years old). I still remembered the night we brought him over to Klinik Dr. Asri in Serusop / Anggerek. Chose to do it here pasal lesser crowd and lower anxiety (for mummy).  He only started to feel the pain when we reached back home that night and terus fell asleep... woke up the next morning (pain was bearable) and he was all smiles! 

Mama and Babah is so proud of you Abang I.. may Allah protect our family and guide us always. 

Little Miss S pun nda ketinggalan with her newly achievement this December. It was our 2nd time persuading her to be toilet trained. The first time was middle of this year, sekajap saja nda pakai diapers then the rest of the day "pakai pampers saja!" One week we tried and was unsuccessful, so we decided to just go with the flow and see how it goes. So randomly 2 weeks ago we asked her to just wear her undies and surprise, surprise.... she made it through the day!!!  Alhamdulillah~ We were like.. this is too good to be true... try lagi the next day, and the following day.. sama jua! (And ofcourse we praise her everytime she asks anyone of us to bring her to the toilet to pee and poo) Mesti puji to make them more semangat and as promised, I bought her another set of undies from mothercare since there is a sale on-going now *lol* We then observe her diaper throughout night time (sleep time) and noticed that the diaper inda wet and she will only request to go to the toilet when she wakes. 

Achievement unlock my dear Little Miss S. Sekolah next year nanti can join swimming lessons!

So now, as promised to both of them. We'll be fulfilling their December wishlist (which involves activities in Brunei only) Can't go out the country due to my condition at the moment. This I will pun in another entry. Until then...

xoxo

...feeling helpless

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته

Who would've thought the time would come when I will feel so helplessly helpless as I heard my very own child cried for us. I just have to. I must! WE MUST (as my husband said it). I didn't want to leave him with the teacher on the first day, no! Not after the loud scream and cries calling for 'Mama!!!' Arrrggghhh, must-not-give-in. Part of me kept of saying that this is normal, most young kids cried on their first day... most want their parents to be around and ALL MOM, I can confidently say, can't bear hearing the pleas of their children.

Took a lot of courage to walk away from his class that day. There I was stepping away from his classroom, anxiously thinking how good he would be behaving, how his teacher manage the whole class, how would he treat his friends... will he pee in his pants? will he eat his snacks? will he lose his things? Yes, call it paranoia! Little Mr. I has finally gone to school..

It's coming to a month after that very first day... Little Mr. I now loves going to school. Did all sort of artsy crafty school work and is a happy, happy boy! The best part is, seeing his happy face and having him hug me lovingly everytime we pick him up from school. Mama is so proud of you sayang... LOVE YOU LOADS! And Baby S too..

Pray that the both of you will be amongst the pious, always be in Allah's guidance and protections, and will always be in Allah's blessing... Amin...

xoxo

It has been hectic..

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته

HNY 2015 to all! A little bit late... and incase I missed it yet again, HCNY!

Here we are in the second month of 2015! Really? Has January gone by so swiftly?! I have not recuperated from all the hecticness! Goodness me! #toomuchexclamationmarksalready

We have finally settled in our new place *not a permanent one just yet* but Alhamdulillah! Took me only 20mins drive to and from my campus every morning, noon and afternoon. So this is how it feels like to be a full-time student AND a mother of two!!

Little Mr. I as I mentioned in the earlier post has settled in quite happily in school. Nope, not minding the fact that he is attending the afternoon session and has made friends with our new neighbour's kids whom he played with every afternoon... Baby S is coming 5 mths by end of this week and our BF-ing journey still continues *patsmyselfontheback* Alhamdulillah~ she can roll on her back now and know her Mama's schedule quite well. Don't mind dearest me during the day but at night, I'm all hers... *lol* her brother pun mesti by herside esp. when it's sleep time. Fyi, fav feeding position is lying side by side on our bed... sometimes kesian I tengok Little Mr. I, he needs me but I'm left helpless if I were to be feeding Baby S.. and despite that, he still prefers me than his father. Mothers are everything, yes? 

Since I'm back to studying, I kept on thinking how much I have change over the past decade! Yes, it has been a decade since I first entered Uni and now I'm back as a full-time research student. Semoga dipermudahkan segala urusan ..insyaAllah~ May Allah guide us through this new phase of life.. Amiinnn...

Until next time..xoxo

... hello December! 2015 preps...

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته

This is a #latepost ...

Finally had a celebration for Little Mister I and many thanks to all who came and celebrate it with us. Yes, for the 2 birthdays he's had before we only celebrate kecil-kecilan sahaja and this year, why not kan? Since he's been bugging us with a happy birthday celebration with cakes and all~ so yeh... Initially was planning to do everything at home but we ended up with celebrating it at KFC. Next year perhaps? We'll see...

We've enrolled him for school next year..can't wait!! Another milestone for him .. *sigh* Guess I'll be one of those mothers peeping through the class window hoping that her child will do good in school. Sanggup kah kan tinggalkan him ah? I'm having separation anxiety already..!! Noooo!! I  have yet to make him his uniform (yes, yes I know... ahir sudah ni, takut inda siap but insyaAllah they can get it done.. will go to the tailor shop this weekend)...semoga dipermudahkan segala urusan nanti *Amin*

Oh yes- on another note, dear 'ol  me pun FINALLY starting my studies early next year... anxiously waiting for my pending approval. Supposed to start last August but after consideration and as advised by my Supervisors, I better start early next year...  yes, have to go through all the process in order to defer my LDP scholarship to 2015. (My earlier approval was just until end of 2014) So masani, menanti sebuah jawapan.. but if ikut my institution, I am supposed to start my research studies next January. Which means, I'll only be working a few days end of this year then sambung lagi cuti belajar for the next two years... Alhamdulillah~ Mudahan ada jawapannya soon... 

It'll be a busy month for us ni. Hubby will be away for a two weeks course overseas (wished we could join him!), then on the same day ia balik, my parents will be off for Umrah with few of my aunts and cousins ... again, missed my chance to join them. Praying for invitations ke sana one day... *Amin* In the meantime, I need to do my errands, prepare and settle few things before 2015.

Until my next entry,

xoxo

..... 18 months

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته

It comes to a realisation that it has been, yes, 1.5 years since Baby.I was born! He's grown so much that this entry will be endless if I were to update everything!!! 

First and foremost, Alhamdulillah for blessing us with Little Mr.I. Who eats almost everything now except chocs, ice-creams and candies (because Mama A is very particular) He no longer eats raw steam veggies instead, he eats cooked ones *yay* Babah and Mama are very proud of you Little.I !!! He loves his mixed veggies, steam fish with tomato sauce, chicken soup and mince beef with garlic soy sauce and a few other fritters! Still prepare them slightly blended (except fritters) and kept frozen (better to make large portion for a week / two weeks' stock rather than having to cook them everyday!) ... Some things us working mothers do! *lol*

Secondly, Little I now has increased in vocab of words both Malay and English! Going from 'horse' 'car' 'trAin' 'mam' 'num' and many more. Prays that Little.I will be someone useful and truthful to Allah SWT one day.. *Ameen ya Rabb*

On another note, I'm still weighing out options on how to toilet train Little.I... Thought of training pants or shall I just simply go straight to let him wear those cute tiny underwears?? One mother once told me to wait until he can actually tell us that he's about to peepee or poopoo, another told me to train him with training pants.... Another Mom just simply said, let him wear underwears and feel uncomfy everytime he's done #1 & #2s. I have read through alot of articles on potty cum toilet train and some even given checklist on signs of readiness. Question is? Is Little.I ready? I've to trust my mother's intuition plang ni.. we'll see! It's another joyride *ahem* milestone for us to achieve by age 2. Another 6 months to go...~~~~~~~

Can't blieve it's almost June !?!? and I still have not heard pasal my LDP application, has it been approved? I am only waiting their (JPA/SPA) approval saja lagi... Nervous? Ho yes!! The suspense is unbearable!! Mudahan ja dapat lah.... Insya-Allah *pray for me* and as for my IELTS, I've manage score 6.5 Despite the difficulty faced for my writing exam. Alhamdulillah~ And the Uni I'm applying has given me the offer and CAS no. .... Tick, tock, tick, tock....

... officially a toddler!!

Alhamdulillah, syukran ya Rabb for all the blessings!! Baby.I is offically a toddler!! I remember few days back when I told the nurse that he walks while holding my pinky? Hahaha well, he's no longer doing that and he can toddle on his own now.. *yay* This is as of Friday evening before he went to bed and yesterday, macam pro tia duduk berdiri on his own.... *happytears* 

More child safety products to be installed at our place..... i.e safety gates, fridge lock, padding mat etc. After all, his safety and developments are our priorities... so yes! Let's get surfing!

... 10 months ...

Assalamualaikum,

Remembering back few years ago when I first started my personal blog. I was in my Uni years *i think* Sometimes I post sad stories and sometimes happy ones.. well- we all do. This entry will be a mix of both.

I have been keeping a secret from everyone the past few month(s). I was pregnant. It was unexpected but alhamdulillah for giving me the chance to conceive again... eventhough Baby.I was just 7 mths back then. Lots of things came into my mind masa atu, can I cope menjaga two little ones at one time, Baby.I and the new bub? Anxious too! Hoping this time around it will be a girl... but all that is left is just hope.This somehow made me realise, nothing in the world lasts forever. Allah may give you something but He may also want to take it back whenever He wishes to. Aku redha dengan ketentuanMu ya Allah.....

Last Saturday, exactly 11.30pm I had a miscarriage. I can feel it coming plg sudah because I was on a fever (39+) since Wednesday. I couldn't get up... can barely walk, my head feels sooo..hmmm~ how to say yea... sakit lah basically~  Friday had my spotting, nervous cos I've seen this before (my 1st pregnancy fyi) and the ending is not what everyone would ever want. I went quiet the whole day, hubby brought me up to ER and I got myself admitted. Bleeding went on and heavier till Saturday afternoon when I actually start to feel the contraction... ya Allah, it was an emotional moment. I was in pain, visiting hours was still few hours away, I want my husband to be there, I miss Baby.I, I'm scared that I'm gonna lose my little one, I'll be experiencing D&C... I felt so helpless. I have never felt that way before and since I was put in an isolation room due to my fever, I cried. 

I was abit calm when hubs came and told him that there's no hope lagi, it will happen... and it did at 11.30pm (again I was alone with just the nurses around) around that time inda lagi terasa any contractions but just feeling of wanting to go to the restroom and then, there it went into the toilet bowl (good thing I didn't flush). The baby was still a size of a little kitten... *damiiitnyaaaa* sad and sakai I was at the same time when the nurse showed me my baby and placenta... kesian lah usulnya... The doctor oncall that night did a scan and there were pieces of my placenta still left inside my uterus hence, last Sunday. I had a D&C. First time to be given anaesthetic, first time entering and O&T .... feeling is not that scary at all... Alhamdulillah~ The procedure went well and boy, was I sleepy the whole day! *lol*

Alhamdulillah, maybe Allah has His reason for all of this. Setiap apa yang berlaku mesti ada hikmah disebaliknya. Maybe Baby.I is not ready to share our love and attentions... just maybe. Insya-Allah, another rezeki will come, maybe in a different form... wallahuwa'lam.

******************************************

On another note, TODAY is Baby.I's 10 month's!!!! Two more months til he's ONE!!! Mummy is all excited because she has something planned for Baby.I and the family in November.  Can't wait!! So far he's two pair of teeth, a pair di atas and a pair di bawah.... he babbles a lot and abis semua kan digigitnya! *lol* He can get himself up to a standing position by himself and is now learning to make tiny steps (with support ofcourse) ... adoooorable!!!

HAPPY 10 MONTHS SAYANG ....... MAMA & BABAH LOVE YOU SO MUCH !!! 

GROW UP WELL AND GROW UP STRONG.

... untitled

It's the Consumer Fair weekend and yes, as much as I'm tempted to go and have a little looksie at the fair, the idea of queuing kan nai the shuttle bus to the fair made me think twice on going... So here I am, watching Lord of The Rings on HBO. I know I've watched it before but I can't recall the story... *sigh* Another lazy Sunday infront of the tv...

..................................... yes I was suppose to continue this last weekend (or was it the last 2 weeks sudah? *checks calendar.... yes, it was 2 weeks ago!! *LOL*) and post it up but no~ as said above, it was a lazy Sunday + hectic days and so today, baru th ada kerajinan to post an entry. 

It has been awhile since I last brought Baby.I for an outing and since today is the Grand Opening of Mothercare's new outlet @ Kiulap, and since I have not done any shopping therapy (apart from bli kain for baju raya which was months back sudah)... so yeah~ off we went to see the new mothercare.. ramainya ibu2 menyopping! I myself managed to get a few stuffs jua *hehe* tempted to get some maternity clothes (yatabah.. bila inda beguna atu ada tia yang lawa2.... *sigh*) but tak jadi lah~ tutup mata saja I! 

The past few weeks, I was tempted to buy Baby.I a forward facing car seat cos he now prefers to be in a sitting position when he's up (though most of the time sleeping) while travelling in the car... but sadly, mahal lah they sell. Been searching di Miri jua hoping for a good bargain, but noooo.. they don't sell the particular seat yang I want!! Even if they do... super expensive!! And then, forgetful ol' me juaaaaaa....forgot that my colleague(s) were actually in their final LDP years this year and some balik sudah and even their trunks!!! should've bekirim saja from them.... *HMPH* Note to self ladies, if you have any relatives currently or going to end their studies this year or whenever year... it's a cheaper bargain these bulky items @ Mothercare Online UK. Suruh saja durg bawa balik pakai their trunks (if you can wait lah...)

Nuff said about that, Baby.I's moving on a walker now! Seronok tengok him strolling himself kesana kemari and bila ia ngalih, well... he just simply put his arms up and cries for us to take him out of the walker. He bubbles, he loves most of his purees I made for him and he's also showing his emotions on few occasions now! Especially for likes / dislikes, when he needs diaper changes (hoping this will be a good sign for early potty training when he's a toddler nanti) and feeding time. Alhamdulillah, so far he's developing well emotionally as well as physically... Our place should be made baby proof soon by the looks of it! :) :) :)

.... Happy Advance 8th Months dearies ....

.. the 6th ...

Alhamdulillah, syukur for all His guidance and blessings to our little family, Baby.I is now 6 months.

Dearest Mummy.I just got herself some toys to play with this weekend. Hehehe. Baby.I, as I believe, is  ready for weaning. Plan is to start on bubur beras pusu (applying the 4 days wait) - then fruit purees (advisable apple and pear for cooked ones) - then for mashed raw ones: avocados, banana n perhaps papaya. :)

I've been doing my reading on making and freezing homemade baby food.... and was able to summarize a few facts :

• frozen purees can last up till 3 months BUT majority advises to actually use them within a month of freezing
• once thawed, the food mustn't be re-freeze (so I'm guessing better to make small batches of 'em) now I know why Annabel Karmel used the freeze trays or pots!! As tempted as I am on buying them, I much preferred buying those clear plastic containers we can easily find arah kedai $1.80 or cutepacks! As long as it is BPA free, shouldn't be a problem. ;)
• frozen food must be thawed inside a refrigerator and this can last up to 72hours in the fridge, though some websites advised to use them within 48hours. SO it's your pick. :)
• once thawed, the purees can either be served cold or warm. whichever you prefer as well.
• on adding EBMs to food, it is better to add them upon serving, i.e for thinning the purees, as EBMs when thawed cannot be frozen lagi, i.e used to thin the purees,
• on adding formula milk, this can be added when preparing the purees and be frozen together, but ofcourse my choice would be, only to add them when needed :)

So, dengan semangat yang tinggi... I am ready to prepare Baby.I's first meal tomorrow! *yay* Wonder how Baby.I will take it... heee~

will post pics soon!

... a little update ...

Assalamualaikum peeps,

Just a short entry to get myself awya from the real world~ (short kah banar ni?) Apart from my addiction to the apps 'DrawSomething' now... I have gone to another phase of my research addiction, i.e baby weaning. Nope, my son has not shown any significant signs of weaning. He's feeding intake is just about the same... so, my guess would be sudah he's like 7 months lah baru start ni. Just enough time for dearest Mama and Babah to prepare all the stuffs. We've no plans to put him into one of those bumbo chair pasalnya payah plg kami kan slouching and all... BUT we did manage to get him an IKEA Antilop high chair (a very good deal) at a family's garage sale. It was only a few months old... + tray aaaannnd it comes with the back support cushion. Now, who can resist such offer? Tray is detachable at least nanti once Baby.I is big enough to sit by the table with us.. that can easily be removed! :)

At least, other than his playstation (not the game ah), he can sit here as well when we're doing house chores~... :D :D The playstation, as I called it, is actually this...

We have not put him in a walker just yet but Baby.I really enjoyed his time on this one. Apart from rolling himself from one end to the other end of his playmat. Yes, people.. he rolls now!! Have to jaga-jaga especially during diaper change! Baby.I memang not the kind yang suka bertimang but we bought this just in case in the future we have a baby who does.. *lol* Save jua sikit tenaga menimang2 , no? 

Next Tuesday will be Baby.I's next appointment... no more jabs, cos he's completed all the Polios and DPTs dah~ But I am keen to ask them regarding the Rotavirus & Pneumococcal since it is not listed in the Yellow Card. Tempted to get them arah private clinic (although, now may be a little too late sudah) but would like to hear the doc's opinion regarding the matter. :) Asal appointment lupa saja due to iskiness menyukat2 badan and weighing our little one + was more concern on his eczema back then... so yea~ Reaaaally need to ask about it nanti. *must remember this time around*

I don't know, they say it's normal for a woman after giving birth to be slightly forgetful. I wonder if all the other mommies out there pun cematu? My case, even kunci kereta pun kadang2 I myself boleh lupa. Yth now, as per advised, I'm also taking supplement to prevent this from getting worst. Insya-Allah~ A good friend of mine introduced it to me. Apparently she's been taking them ever since that honey shop at Gadong Properties exist! Nyehh~~

 

Ingredients ada madu, kurma, zaffaron & kismis. Since I'm not a big fan of kismis, I hope consuming this helps. It's good for all ages but babies kena hati-hati sikit. Advisable to bagi toddlers lah.... 1-3 years of age. Depending on individuals lah yea... But yes, insya-Allah~ this will definitely help. :)

Until next time... xoxo~

... full time

Assalamualaikum mommies....

Another episode of Baby.I's sensitive skin. Before it was just his cute cheeks, now we noticed his skin being oh-so-sensitive to insect bites (mosquitoes and ants) too! It started off with just a normal red bite bump but then worsens on to flaring up & scaly! Kalau arah kitani bah... memang for sure bergaru berabisly! And I mean- vigorously!! I've taken a few photos of it but belum I transfer to the laptop... hence, will update this entry once I do so.. :D

Starting this week, I've succeeded with trials of full time CD-ing for Baby.I. Last week was my 1st try out. Planned to actually not changing him in between his slumber but ended up changing him after 8hrs of night diapering. No leaks though, don't get me wrong hehehehe Mamanya ani saja yang beruri takut2 tambus... jadinya, as Baby.I woke up for his midnight feed.. I changed his CDs. *lol* But as of last night, he is fully clothed for night diapering as well. Alhamdulillah~ no leaks and no stinky smell.

Another milestone achieved!! ~

Apart from that, Alhamdulillah... Baby.I's development is emerging rather well (refer to this site). He's now 4mths and 3 weeks... soon kan masuk 5 months and another month to go insya-Allah for him to start weaning. He loves to be held on his feet and sometime(s) enjoys his tummy time. Time really flies THAT fast!!! ... Grow up well Baby.I, one day you'll make both Mama and Babah so proud of you... *Amin*